- (Sylvia) “Don’t stop. You love to play drums and I love watching you enjoy yourself, playing your drums.”
- (me) “I can’t. I just don’t have the energy now… Yes, I want to celebrate your Birthday but it doesn’t seem right, because you’re not “physically” here… and I can’t celebrate your “crossing-over”… your “coBirthday” (4/9/11) because it would be celebrating your leaving me (at least “physically”).”
Today, I was looking through LOTS of files… trying to find the web pages My Sylvia had created, several years ago. I want to Post them on this Blogsite, so everyone can see at least “part” of My Sylvia’s words, thoughts and images.
During my search, I found a couple of text files. Not knowing what they were from their filenames, I opened and read them. Probably not the best things “I” could have done… because my girl’s “Wisdom”, “Love for others” and “general caring for everyone” stands-out to me and makes me miss her even more. (If that’s possible.)
While Sylvia was on THIS side of the “Veil”, we had our own Macintosh-only training, troubleshooting and consulting business. In 2009, one of our Clients experienced her husband’s “crossing-over”. When we heard about this, Sylvia sent her this eMail. (Sylvia used the Client’s first-name in the message but I have changed it to “Mrs.W” here for privacy.)
Note: This is also an Insight into Sylvia’s thoughts on someone “crossing-over”. A year or 2 before I met Sylvia, her Son had crossed-over. She withdrew from her entire life at that time, for about a year. So Sylvia knows, very deeply what it’s like to lose someone very dear to your Heart.
(This is Sylvia’s message to our Client)
On Nov 20, 2009, at 4:10 AM, Sylvia wrote:
We are both doing well and busy with projects, as usual. Thank you for asking. Since Paul and I both have special feelings in this case , we decided to each reply separately.
I am greatly relieved to read your sharing which reassures us that all has gone as smoothly as possible, with closures for family members, and that you shall be taken care of and looked after. Your smooth path and support are well-deserved.
We’ve often commented on how kind and considerate you both have been. Special. That has made our encounters a definite pleasure.
You are wise to avoid decision-making until at least the first of the year. Properly done, grief is a full-time job. After all, you have to re-train your inner heart and soul to evaluate and re-file all the pieces that make up your daily life now that half of you is no longer in physical form. Only you can do this . . . When I was working through my grief trauma several years ago now, I found that most folks mean well, but know nothing unless they, too, have had such a loss. Do stay confident in yourself. You’re embarking on a journey of self-discovery that never quits. May you continue holding your shared love, and be as kind to yourself as would please Mr.W.
Your ” And Mr.W, who never liked being the center of attention, will be the center of attention and there is nothing he can do about that! Plus, he deserves it.” brought a smile to my lips. I totally agree.
Much love to you and yours.
(This is the response from “Mrs.W.”)
Thank you so much, Sylvia, for those kind and, as Mr.W would have said, “right on target” words. It is so true that as a now single lady I am starting a new journey of self discovery. While it is not something I would have chosen to do right now, it is a beautiful opportunity for me, especially surrounded by dear and caring family and friends. Each day I take a new step toward re-training my heart and soul (I loved that comment), and each day I treasure him more. I am filled with gratitude for him and my “cup runneth over with love.”
With many thanks to you for your lovely comments. By the way you write, it is clear you have taken this journey. Thanks so much for your wise and loving counsel.